tender mercies

i love the tender mercies that i receive every day

today i got a little note from a really awesome lady

"man, you sure are something else, super strong."

(talking about going on a mission)

i've had great feelings of love and comfort these days

i usually don't do journal posts but to keep everyone

in the loop i thought i might as well, right?

i struggled a lot with the decision to talk or not to talk

to spencer on mother's day i had previously made up my

mind that i WAS NOT going to talk to him and i would see

him soon enough when he got home. spencer wrote and

told me that he would really like to speak with me on mother's

day and we could figure everything out. i was instantly panicked

then an over whelming feeling of peace and comfort swept my soul.

*

"Closely related to this example is the person who has a strong desire to be led by the Spirit of the Lord but who unwisely extends that desire to the point of wanting to be led in all things. A desire to be led by the Lord is a strength, but it needs to be accompanied by an understanding that our Heavenly Father leaves many decisions for our personal choices. Personal decision making is one of the sources of the growth we are meant to experience in mortality. Persons who try to shift all decision making to the Lord and plead for revelation in every choice will soon find circumstances in which they pray for guidance and don’t receive it. For example, this is likely to occur in those numerous circumstances in which the choices are trivial or either choice is acceptable.

We should study things out in our minds, using the reasoning powers our Creator has placed within us. Then we should pray for guidance and act upon it if we receive it. If we do not receive guidance, we should act upon our best judgment. Persons who persist in seeking revelatory guidance on subjects on which the Lord has not chosen to direct us may concoct an answer out of their own fantasy or bias, or they may even receive an answer through the medium of false revelation. Revelation from God is a sacred reality, but like other sacred things, it must be cherished and used properly so that a great strength does not become a disabling weakness."

i have been praying my guts out these last couple of weeks

and feeling the same promptings about a mission and marriage

at first i was very disappointed thinking that Heavenly Father

would provide a strong feeling of assurance to one but not the other

i wanted the answer

"NO, do not get married, or NO do not go on a mission"

when studying my preach my gospel i read the quote above.

either choice is acceptable

the greatest feeling of peace and comfort has just

filled my little being. come what may, and love it. will do.

my papers are completed i'm beginning to read the

missionary reference library and prepare, prepare & love it.

prepare to relax, go to the temple and study these things out in my mind.

prepare to speak with spencer on mother's day with the spirit.

prepare to be willing to fully and completely turn my will to God's.

prepare to do some intense praying and intense listening.

prepare to make the things of the home of primary importance in my life

prepare for a mission, marriage, motherhood and exaltation.

xoxo

OLIVIA